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[17 Oct 2003|07:33am]
im gonna get other journal
this one is gonna expire pretty soon so you can take me out of your friend list.
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[16 Oct 2003|07:39am]
[ mood | confused ]

Jazmin called me yesterday twice.
and i wasnt home.
it's already fucked up.

and yesterday me and Geno practiced the new songs in secret.
and i think we have enough to be a new kinda band.
then i walked to my house from Geno's house.
then when i got home my tia told me that Jazmin had called me twice.
so i just waited for her next call(yeah right she was gonna call)
and then somebody called and i thought it was her but it was some other girl.
she asked me who i was and then she asked me which school do i go to.
i told her WHS and she said "yeah right"
that was pretty weird.

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[15 Oct 2003|07:31am]
[ mood | happy ]

Jazmin called me yesterday.
from a pay phone.

XXX i will never quit XXX

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[14 Oct 2003|07:44am]
[ mood | confused ]

i will never quit

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[09 Oct 2003|07:40am]
[ mood | happy ]

yesterday i talked to Bianca.
i went to her house at night after GHOTS' practice.
i was all fucking scared.
but i didnt care tho.
so i went.
i asked for her.
then she came out.
she told me she wanted to talk to me.
so we talk.
and she told me the answer i already knew.
"i dont want a boyfriend right now i wanna enjoy my freedom"
but the cool thing was.
that she does like me.
she told me.
im so happy.
so i told her we should wait till we both ready.
cuz i dont really want a girlfriend now either.

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[08 Oct 2003|07:36am]
[ mood | hopeful ]

i talked to Janice yesterday and
she told me why she broke up with me.
because she was getting too attached to me.
and i started thinking that it was cool that we broke up
cuz yeah.
it was better.
and yeah she still likes me.
and i dont wanna give her any hopes.
cuz i know what happens when that happens.
somebody gets hurt.

yesterday i thought Bianca was gonna give me an answer.
but she didnt tell me shit.
and im still waiting.
but i wanna tell her something cuz i know she doesnt want a boyfriend right now.
i dont know what to do.

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[07 Oct 2003|07:49am]
[ mood | hopeful ]

well yesteday Bianca didnt come to school.
that it.
i still waiting.

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[06 Oct 2003|07:40am]
[ mood | hopeful ]

yesterday i went to the mall to get some new shoes
then we went to the chinesse food.
and in the fortune cookie i got something that said.
"tell the one you love that you do"
then my pops wanted to get a frappucino.
and when we were walking to the mall i saw somebody known
it was Bianca.....
with her family....
i tried to just say hi and then walk away
but Jen started talking to me.
and her parents stoped to say hi to my pops.
it was fucking weird.

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[04 Oct 2003|06:50pm]
[ mood | tired ]

well i did something that maybe is gonna
make me happy
or hurt me.

i asked Biana out.
it was an emergency.
i didnt plan it.
but i did it.
yesterda at the show.

Jazmin helped me out a little bit giving me courage to do it.
and i did it.
i took me a long time to say it
then finally Bianca told me:"SO ARE YOU ASKING ME OUT"
then i just said yeah.
she didnt say anything.
then she said to me
i was cracking up.
then i think i hugged her or something like that i dont really remember.
and now she gots me waiting and thinking
i hate when a girl does that to me.

i dont really know what she's gonna say.
of course i expect a YES.
but my mind tells me is gon' be a NO.
i hope she says yes.
i dont feel like suffering now.
but that was the risk i took.
so i guess i just gotta hang in the moment and be strong.
and be ready for whatever is gon' be.

fuck i like her so much.

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[03 Oct 2003|07:34am]
[ mood | hyper ]

oh yeah there's a show today at Ramsey
same ol' show
y'all guys know

and yeah i think things are going pretty well.
i actually feel happy.

today Gabby's gonna straighten my hair.
im-a look all cool.


what else?

i dont know
today's a short day
i got sme plans for before the show
i dont know if they gonna go well.
i'll just wait.

a few months ago i discovered that Bane is a fucking syco killa from Southamerica.
he killed all kinds of people in frustration with a handgun
if you dont believe me go to Yahoo en espanol type Bane on the searcher and you'll find the info.
it's crazy

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[01 Oct 2003|07:07pm]
[ mood | now i dont know ]

well i think i feel happy about some stuff, but then i feel kinda sad about other.
see my friends Jen and this new friend Anestesia they have serious problems.
like i wanna help 'em and all that shit, but........
i dunno.........
it makes me kinda mad.
i dont know why.
Bianca didnt go to school today i kinda missed her.
but she's online now.
well i guess.

i made some new riffs for some new songs.
im eating a grilled chesse sandwhich with turkey and avocado.
and i think Janice still likes me.
she called me the other day.
i was all freaked out.
first i thought it was Jen or Bianca.
but nah she said it's me Janice like if i knew who she was.
i felt all bad cuz i didnt really feel like talking to her.
actually i dont feel like talking to her anymore.
i dont know why.
i think im being stupid.
i dunno.....
but i feel happy now.
for some reason.
that i dont know if i should be happy.
i make myself sad.

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[01 Oct 2003|07:46am]
[ mood | sad ]

yesterday i stayed home all day. after school of course.
i feel like doing something that maybe it's gonna hurt me if i do it.
but i dunno
Im getting all mixed up.
maybe i should just walk away.

Bianca told me that that kid Sam dozen walk with us because he's jealous of me(i was stupet)
who tha hell can be jealous of me.
he says that he dozen fit in our little "punk" crew(i was stupet) and that we just talk about music(stupet!)
music is the last thing we'd talk about.
oh yeah and Bianca is one of those Mexican girls that like white guys.
that fucking pisses me off.
and i dont like blonde girls.
she said that im the first guy that she hears him say that.
she says that im gonna marry a white broad.
i say FUCK NO!
i'll die first.


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[30 Sep 2003|07:40am]
[ mood | okay ]

well my computer is being a bitch so Im not gonna be logging on for a while 'til i get a new one. but im gonna be updating this shit here in the library. so yeah.......
yesterday i tried to go online but my computer kills so i couldnt. earlier that day i was hangin out with Bianca and she told me that she doesnt like guys who dont have the balls to ask girls out, i have a feeling that she was saying it because of me. cuz she knows i like her so much so maybe that's why.
then she said that i have to wear more t-shirts and less sweatshirts i told her fuck that cuz i love sweatshirts.
but that was it.

over the weekend i went to the SCARS OF TOMORROW show and it was pretty fucking bad. with FINAL BURDEN the pit got all violent but i went in anyways cuz that's how crazy i am.
then this friday there's this show at Ramsey but is the same ol' show.
and i dunno.............maybe.............i'll go........

well that's it.

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[25 Sep 2003|05:10pm]
[ mood | good ]

oh yeah
i got a new friend, i met her yesterday. her name is Anastasia
she's pretty cool and shit.
she has relly nice eyes they are like gree then blue.
and she wears glasses so her eyes look al big.
and yesterday Bianca didnt come go to school cuz she was all sick.
buttoday she went and i didnt hang out with them.
i was hangin out with Anestesia(my god i love to say that name)
and Gabby was all making fun of me and saying that i stole Oscar's girlfriend.
but nah im still being Bianca's.
i mean.....
this girl is weird.
i think she just wants to hang out with us.
she said her friends dont really talk to her.
but i dunno.......
so after school i saw Bianca and i talked to her
asked her how she was feeling and she still sick. that sux
i invited her to the show yesterday and she told me that maybe
but someimes mabe means NO
and sometimes NO means MAYBE
and sometimes MAYBE means YES SURE
and WHY NOT?
so tomorrow im goin to that fucken shoe for shizzle my nizzle.
o aight i think that it.


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transient smile [23 Sep 2003|04:58pm]
[ mood | confused ]

well there's nothing goin on, oh yeah
Gabby started calling me Angel
that's pretty funny
i dont know why

yeah umh

nothing happens
well there's a couple of shows comming up
then GIVE UP THE GHOST which im not goin

then this week there's this double booked show
and the other show is
and then the mosh fest with a bunch of cool bands like
and i dunno many of them
then there's this one on hallowen
and other
im goin to that one fo' sure
all of this shows areat Jimmy's
and im inviting Jen and Bianca
and Geno
and probably Joe
and maybe Jeff

well i gotta go

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kill the baby sitter [20 Sep 2003|09:04am]
[ mood | hopeful ]

well something was wrong with this shit.
my uncle was fixing the printer.so now is cool
it's been a cool month i been doin some cool stuff.
i went to the BLEEDING THRU show it was awesome.
then what else........

i dont know many things.
i been hangin out with Jen and Bianca alot(nothing new)
and yeah that's about it

yesterday was Bianca's birthday i wanted to take her to the show yesterday but she was gonna do somethin with her family.
but anyways the show was hella bored, none of the bands showed up except for USOS and KICKSTAR DEVILS and they kinda sucked, ad i didnt get to hear USOS with their new singer.

i have a present for Bianca and yeah she's gonna like it.

oh and yeah i need to practice with my band uz i made new songs

and Oscar told me if i wanted to sing for them and well i got for of their songs already but i dont know if they wanna keep me, but yeah i think im gonna sing for GHOST STILL BLEED but i dunno.

well that it
i have some plans for today but i dont think they gonna work out.
i hope they do.


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obsession(did i spell it right) [12 Sep 2003|07:54pm]
[ mood | okay ]

argh nothing happens
and tomorrow im going to the show
it's gon be cool
im bored

im alone
and okay(english accent)

and bored
i had some plans
but they never go right.

im goin......................



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stalking freshmen girls [11 Sep 2003|07:31pm]
[ mood | okay ]

i got AIM
it's xparanoicox

that it.

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stalking freshmen girls [11 Sep 2003|07:29pm]
[ mood | okay ]

i got AIM
it's xparanoicox

that it.

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fuck birds [10 Sep 2003|06:07pm]
[ mood | okay ]

today i did the same stuff as usual.
go to skool
wait desperately for brake
wait desperately for lunch
find Bianca and hang out with her
have fun
wait for the bell
say bye to Bianca
walk around the boring scene of Watson
go home and wait for death.

yesterday i walked with Bianca and Marilyn
it was pretty fun.

im gonna try to hang out more with her
she's a pretty cool person to hang out with
and it's not that i have a crush on her
it's jus that she's cool
and i probably wont go out with her never, eva, eva eva.
but it's just cool to have a friend like her.

this saturday there's a show at Jim Dandy's
this show's gonna be sick
im going for sure homie.

well later and have fun.

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